My Challenge For 2020: 5-10-15-20

I started 2019 with a Focus Four project where I chose four products each week to focus on. That project really helped me become more comfortable with having a small collection, and cycling through four different products a week meant that I learned a lot about what I owned. However, those of you who have been reading this blog throughout the year likely know that my interest in makeup has greatly diminished since the start of the year. This situation calls for a different kind of challenge, one that encourages me to use something, anything.

In 2020, I will be doing a new activity where I will pick four products or actions and challenge myself to do them 5, 10, 15, and 20 times. I'll still be picking four items, but it'll be changing on a monthly basis, not weekly. For January, my list will look like this:

5 - paint nails.
10 - use Urban Decay Rockstar eyeliner.
15 - wear eyeshadow.
20 - wear lipstick.

To specify, for paint nails I will count fingers and toes separately, so I might paint my fingers four times and my toes once, or three and two... You get the idea.

For the first month I've kept it fairly easy and vague. I'm still getting accustomed to applying makeup as much as I used to in previous years, and right now I just want the encouragement to do something, anything. As the year progresses, however, I look forward to my challenge getting more specific. Perhaps I'll choose to use a certain palette twenty times, or even a specific eyeshadow.

I'm excited to start this new challenge, and I'm ready to embrace more things that are "for me" this year. It's time for a change, so here we go 

Comparing Collections

2014 YouTube was my introduction to the makeup world. That was a special time for YouTube. It was when everyone felt like your friend. Sponsorships and PR happened, but they weren't as well known as they are now. It seemed like buying everything in a collection was the norm.

You needed to have at least one in each category to be considered a true beauty lover, and the more categories you could come up with the more "in" it felt you were. It wasn't enough to just have a few blushes that worked for you. You needed something hot pink, soft pink, plum, nude, peachy pink. You needed them to be matte and shimmery, drugstore and high end.

Before watching YouTube, the only makeup collection I had ever seen was a family member's that easily fit into a single makeup bag. On YouTube though people had huge collections of makeup. And it wasn't just one person either; lots of people had these collections, and they were still buying more every month. Surely, this had to be the norm for those interested in makeup. Or so I thought.

It would take a few years to realize this wasn't the case. Plenty of people who wore makeup had small collections. But after so long of comparing my small correction to the big ones on YouTube, it was only natural for me to compare mine to the minimalistic ones on Reddit.

Whichever way it went, it was not a healthy relationship to have with stuff. What someone else owns shouldn't factor into how much I have or even want. It's not about who has the most or even the least. Or at least it shouldn't be. Makeup collections are such a personal thing. Not every color works for every person, and not every formula works for every person either.

So why do I still watch collection videos from my favorite YouTubers? I no longer seek them out, but if they show up in my subscription feed, I'm usually at least watch the beginning. Is it human nature to just be curious of others? Is there still some part of me that aspires to have what someone else does? I'm not really sure.

How Much Did I Spend This Year?

This year on makeup and skincare I spent $78.61 out of pocket, and without considering gift cards the total was $116.31. (The MSRP plus my local tax would have been $218.41.) I'm so proud of that, not necessarily because the amount is so small, but because of the reason why it is so small.

Everything I bought, with the exception of one item, was on sale or bought with a coupon. But here's the kicker: I waited for those sales and only bought items that I had wanted for some time. I passed on so many sales because I knew they weren't right for me in that moment. I let so many Ulta and Sephora coupons expire because I knew that I would only be buying because of the coupon, not that the coupon would help me out.

For most of the year I wasn't as enthusiastic as I was in years past. The grind of being a SAHM has been getting to me, and I'm slowly coming out of that funk. (Yay toddlers.) Before I would have bought more items to try to reinvigorate my interest. But this year, I instead tried focusing on what I already owned. I took the mindset of if I liked it enough to buy it before, surely I can find some way it excites me now. Were there items that were released this year that piqued my interest, sure. But I can't tell you what they were now. I stopped watching Will I Buy It? videos when I realized that I would have no clue about all these things if it weren't for those videos. Out of sight, out of mind. When I realized there was a hole in my collection I would go in search of something to fill it. I didn't need to be told what my holes were; I needed to figure it out on my own.

Another thing to consider about this total is the state of my collection. I've been interested in makeup (having discovered it through YouTube) for about seven years and have been a member of this subreddit since its inception. Though I rarely post anymore, I still read it constantly, and basically all the YouTubers I watch nowadays align more with this sub than with, say, makeupaddiction. For the past five years I've really been pinpointing what I buy and why. Before I would definitely buy because there was a sale. ("What?! Drugstore brand is BOGO 50% off. I gotta find something to buy!" and "Oooh the Sephora sale is happening soon. I need to watch all ten of these "What to Buy at the Sephora sale videos, so I can get some ideas!") Over the last two years especially the size of my collection has shrunk considerably. I tossed a bunch of expired stuff and things that I just never wore because it wasn't my style. (I tried a few times, but it never felt right. I'm looking at you, blue eyeliner.)

This year I replaced all my eyeliners. I went from maybe 8 to 2. I could have easily bought more, but I learned that I don't go through eyeliner as quickly as I had anticipated, so I chose the two colors I wore the most and could pair with the most of my daily looks. Those two I bought when they were half off. (I figured there was going to be a 30% sale sometime this year but hadn't been expecting 50%. I was so glad I waited and didn't jump on a 20% coupon I had had.)

Instead of buying an eyeshadow palette, I bought four single shadows. It was a gamble because it was from a brand that I had never tried and couldn't swatch in person. I narrowed my wishlist down to the ones I wanted the most and were the most unique to my collection then again waited for a sale to come along. Because it was a new-to-me brand, I looked up sales trends online, and then when I expected a sale would come soon started following them on Facebook.

Other items this year included a new eyeshadow brush trio (This one was like a perfect combination for me. It was on sale, and I had a coupon, and it was from a brand I liked, and I knew I would use every single brush.), a nail polish top coat (I only buy this brand now and had a coupon that made it basically free.), a new nail polish (Yes, it was from that same brand and in a color I've been hoping would be released all year. This one was also free thanks to some Kohl's cash.), three of the same cleansing balms (This alone was $45, but I'm so happy about it. I received this last year as a gift but couldn't justify paying full price this year. I was waiting for a 25% sale that I expected to happen for Cyber Monday, but then another site surprised me by having them 50% off instead.), and a cute brush cleaning set (This was the only thing I bought at full price, but it was only $15 and paid for entirely with a gift card I had been holding onto since Christmas 2017. The theme still makes me smile, and I had been wanting a scrub pad thing for quite a while.)

There are still two weeks left in the year, but I highly doubt I'll buy anything else. There are a handful of things on my mental wishlist, but I know I either can't commit to them right now... Or they just don't exist yet.

Going on a No-Buy After Black Friday Shopping

It seems like the popular thing this week has been to start a year-long no-buy because of what was spent during the Black Friday weekend. Many of the comments I've seen about starting a no-buy have stemmed from regret about spending so much money. And while I can see where these people are coming from with feeling overwhelmed about their spending habits, I feel like for the majority of them they're only going to be frustrated for failing their no-buy in a few months (or weeks).

I've been on a no-buy before. I totally get that participating in one can help you reset your spending habits. But I feel like people who start their no-buys directly as a result of Black Friday shopping are looking for a miracle pill that doesn't exist. If you're considering going on a no-buy (or have already declared yourself on one) as the result of your Black Friday shopping, there's a good chance you just bought a bunch of new stuff. You might like some, you might not. But you still have new things to play with in addition to what you already own. What is going to happen in a few months when you're bored of what you have or when a new product is released that matches your ideal? A year is a long time.

If you don't know why or how you want to change your spending habits declaring a year-long spending fast is likely not going to magically solve the problem. Instead of abstaining from purchases I would recommend monitoring them, at least at first. I realize that not everyone is the same, but this is truly what worked the best for me. I did go on a no-buy initially; I challenged myself to go a whole month without buying anything. I knew that I was spending too much money on makeup and too much time looking for something to buy. (What a time suck that used to be.) 

In my mind deciding to go on a no-buy shouldn't stem from a moment of frustration after one big shopping excursion. Instead, reflect on why you bought so much stuff. What drew you in to purchase it? If you're aware of what caused it this time, maybe that can help you avoid it next time. What do you know about yourself as a spender? What are your triggers when it comes to making a purchase? Are you swayed by corporate marketing? by YouTubers you consider friends? by having a bad day and needing a cheer-me-up purchase? (Mine were wanting to participate in a sale and feeling like I needed to have something in each category that someone else told me existed. Blush topper? But of course I need one of those.) 

Challenge yourself to use something X amount of times before you move on to the next product. At one point I had a rule that whenever I bought something new I could only use that product in that category for 30 days, so if I brought a new lipstick in, was I both willing to use only that one lipstick for an entire month and not use any of my other lipsticks including my most cherished favorite? That rule sure curbed a lot of mindless spending for me.

If you want to go on a no-buy, fine. I can't stop you. But I do suggest that you reconsider your reasoning for going on one. 

I Stuck to My List

It feels like my interest in makeup is finally starting to return, and I'm so happy about that. I think that making my Black Friday wishlist early was one of the best decisions I could have made.

I ended up buying only the Clinique cleansing balm, just like I had mentioned wanting, and I even got it for half off, which was a far better deal than I was expecting. Because of deciding early on in the month what my gameplan was going to be, I found it so much easier to stick to my list.

So how does this relate to me getting interested in makeup again? Oddly enough, it was from reading about people who were stressed out about their Black Friday purchases. It made me appreciate the items I already own even more.

I was so proud of myself for not getting caught up in the sales hype and instead sticking to what I knew in my gut was right for me. I started looking at the container of makeup again, and that's when I realized that what I still own is entirely me. Sure, there are brands and products that are well-known, but I don't have the specific items that YouTubers consider "must haves."

A few years ago I would have been scouring ads and watching countless wishlist and favorites videos to find the "best" deals. I would have been so excited to post a haul list on Reddit and compare it to others.

Nowadays though I see haul posts that seem like bigger than whole inventory, and I'm just shocked. Shocked at how much my mindset on makeup has changed. I don't need a lot to be happy. In fact, I actually prefer fewer choices.

But my favorite thing I've learned this week is that the "best deal" is all subjective, and that's okay.

Monday is the new Friday

Black Friday has already started, and it's only Monday. Over the years the sales have inched earlier and earlier, with the lines blurring between what's actually a Black Friday deal and what's not. There's such a buildup leading into Black Friday nowadays that it's easy to feel obligated to buy something, anything.

I found myself today idly scrolling through the Ulta Black Friday ad. I would zoom in to look at a product description more closely and google the names of products I didn't know to make sure I was matching the caption to the correct product. It was easily a process that I did not need to be doing, especially considering I had already told myself earlier this month that there was only one product I wanted: the Clinique cleansing balm for at least 25% off and free shipping.

So why was I staring intently at Real Techniques brushes and looking up other stores' discounts on the Temptalia master list? Sydney Grace doesn't sell Clinique, so why do I care what sales that company is having?

Today Lauren Mae Beauty posted a YouTube video about abstaining from the Black Friday sales and touched on how much time is spent on looking up multiple sales because one little thing interested you. This is exactly what happened to me today. I could have easily keyboard searched the Ulta ad for Clinique and see if anything popped up. But instead, I was half-heartedly enjoying the hunt for something I was never going to find.

I highly recommend you check out Lauren's video. She makes some really good points about the Black Friday sale and other sales in general.

Tired of This, Tired of That

Sometimes it feels like the more I try to get involved in the makeup community the less I'm interested in it. There are days when I check Reddit repeatedly, hoping that an interesting discussion will be posted, but then nothing will feel worth reading.

I'm tired of posts asking about favorite products. I'm tired of posts "antihauling" new releases. I'm tired of posts bashing YouTubers. When you take away those three categories there aren't many left.

I've stopped seeking out new YouTube channels to watch. The number that I do watch has dwindled over this last year. I've stopped trying to learn about makeup from YouTube and instead treat it as catching up with friends (who have no clue who I am or that I'm there, but that's another issue for another day).